Chaseing
by LyssaRosee
Summary: She's tired because she spends all of her time chasing something.


Disclaimer: I do not own Glee.

A/N: I am reaching a point in my life where I feel like I have been chasing a million different dreams for a million years and I just want to put it all on pause and go sit by a large body of water somewhere and not think for a few months. This has of course made me think about how somebody as ambitious as Rachel might burn herself out a bit younger than most.

Sometimes Rachel thinks she might be tired.

She's tired because she spends all of her time chasing something.

When she's fifteen she spends all her time chasing down all the possible ways she could shine in a glee club that was long defunct. She chased that all the way into Principle Figgins office as she reported Mr. Ryerson for his inappropriate relations with a student. She chases away any guilt she might feel with the thought that this is all for the greater good, a very small casualty in the war for Stardom*. She then chases Mr. Schuster through the halls letting him know her need for a star to sing with.

Mr. Schuster delivers and that gives her a whole new thing to chase, Finn Hudson. He is everything she needs in a lead and a lover.

Her sixteenth birthday was fast approaching and she thinks that its just about time for her OneTrueLove* to come into play. Part of her eighty seven step plan has always been to meet her only love ever in high school because she figures that will keep her from being distracted by a love life when she's performing as Wendla in Spring Awakening, (The first role she plans to take on because it is so age sensitive and she hopes to play the part from ages twenty one to twenty four which she believes is still young enough to portray that sweet naïve nature Wendla has.) and receiving her first four (minimum) Tonys.

So she spends the months leading up to her sweet sixteen plotting and aching in her chase for Finns heart. She never seems to fully grasp it though.

First there's Quinn and the baby, she solves that problem with the truth, but he's still too hurt to fully open up so she decides to move on for a little bit.

She finds something new to chase, Jesse.

There is the drama of being from competing schools, different levels of sexual experience, and their giant diva attitudes.

Then, for a change, somebody chases her. Jesse shows up to glee one day and then she has to spend all her time chasing away stray thoughts of Finn, her insane need for acceptance, and her sneaking suspicion that Jesse is a double agent.

Jesse opens up the chase for her mother. Shelby ends the chase with Beth.

Then she's back to chasing Finn and she doesn't think she's ever been this close before.

They say I love you, exchange name jewelry, plot things together. Just when she starts to close her fingers around the prize Santana slaps it out of her hand.

Rachel thinks she's done chasing Finn now.

Finn might be done but now she has less than two years to meet and fall in love with a boy in order to complete her plan.

She is so bruised though that she chases easy boys, ones she doesn't care about enough, they cant hurt her.

All the while a boy with a stupid hair cut and green eyes is watching her chase all of these boys and dreams waiting for her to slow down enough for him to catch up.

She chased Noah once or twice, not that he ever really ran, but whenever his eyes softened and his kisses became anything less than bruising she stuttered an excuse and began chasing something else. Something with no history or shared religions or grape slushies.

She eventually lets the idea of an eighty seven step plan go and trims it down to a much more efficient seventy four. This plan notably lacks any romantic endeavors.

She chases the war for Stardom* all the way to New York City, 600 miles away from Lima, three blocks away from Noah. (Who is **not **chasing her there, he just happens to get into NYU.)

She lets her life fall into a hectic pattern of battling for the leading role in everything except Noahs heart.

They eat Chinese food together and he tells her about all of his bad dates, the ones who are whiny and vapid or completely without drive, and she ignores that thought in the back of her mind. The one that says that she could slow down a little, that she is none of the things Noah complains about.

Then she chases those thoughts away with the mental image of a silly little girl covered in eggs.

She finally, _finally, _lands Wendla, and for about a minute she lets herself think that this means she can stop chasing everything.

Then she notices the murderous look in her understudies eye and the way that she flirts with the director, so Rachel dusts off her running shoes and starts again.

She wins her first four Tonys.

She hasn't seen Noah since her opening night.

Soon most elite of New York are yelling her name every night and making her their favorite daughter. She starts to go by Rae because her agent says its chic.

Every evening she wisps across the stage barely feeling the heat of the lights and then dances the night away in designer clothes with celebrities.

They marvel at her ability to party all night without a drop of caffeine. (She cant help but think that maybe chasing things her whole life was meant to prepare her for this.)

She does this until one night, she sees a familiar face in the crowd.

Noah sits in the front row smiling, he greets her backstage, and calls her Rachel. She yawns for the first time in years.

She lands the lead in a stage adaptation of the animated film "Tangled".

Noah is there opening nigh and every night after.

She hasn't gone out in months, she just goes home and sleeps, gets up and sings, and then goes back to bed.

She wins six Tonys. Then she quits.

Noah shows up at her pent house apartment and says something about them driving out to Maine to look at a house he wants to buy. He says he's tired of the fast pace of the city.

She says why not fly?

He says he hates having to rush to catch flights.

She says she agrees, packs a suitcase, and they go.

They never go anything more than five miles less than the speed limit the whole way.

They never come back. He buys the house and a ring.

She buys a big comfy bed that they sleep in, late into the morning.

Sitting at the shore, in an old WMHS hoodie and yoga pants, Rachel watches as Noah throws a stick for their dog.

She smiles and breathes with the tide. She is still and not chasing anything anymore.

Why should she when its all here in front of her?

Tada! I know it was choppy and silly but it was a little easy peasy thing stuck in my head.


End file.
